Don't read this post if you haven't seen the movies and want to.
Blood Diamond was an amazing movie. More than anything I've seen before, this movie reminded me of what it is like to live in a place where, instead of bling-bling, its "bling-bang," as Leonardo DiCaprio put it so succinctly. Not that Kandahar was anything like Sierra Leone- it was nowhere near that scale of violence and bloodshed. But watching the movie transported me back to a place where human crises are happening on a totally different scale than America. There's a part in the movie where the rebels take over Freetown, shooting, looting, and burning everything. Forcing child soldiers to shoot up drugs after they kill women and other children. And then I remember my day today.
Strangely enough, there was some twisted comfort for me in realizing that Afghanistan is not the worst place on earth to be. There are still places in Africa that are much worse, where things a thousand times more horrible are happening.
And a week after watching Blood Diamond, I watched Hotel Rwanda. Now, if you have avoided Hotel Rwanda thinking it might be a little too intense for you, just watch Blood Diamond first. It will sort of numb you to the atrocity.
And isn't that what many of us are searching for? We don't want to feel guilty after seeing a movie like that, so many of us aren't watching those movies and documentaries. Like me, who refuses to watch Invisible Children and then go buy a twenty dollar pair of shoes. There's just a level of horrific pain that is much easier to pretend does not exist and buy the shoes.
And this is my huge struggle in life right now. After seeing everything I saw last fall, and movies like Hotel Rwanda and Blood Diamond, how do I come back and live in a place like America without being guilty?
And I mean that, exactly. Not without feeling guilty: without being guilty.
2 comments:
Hi girly. so I have a new blogspot blog because i can't remember my sign-in name or password for my old one. so it's douglessk.blogspot.com now. i'll try to write fairly frequently. it's the only one i can access at work....so maybe i'll remember?
love you and miss you!
You know there are things you can do here. You can always give money, but more imporantly you can pray. Interceeded for the world and the things going on in it makes a big difference. Pretending like it doesn't exist and isn't going on doesn't help anything. You are right. But if you believe that this is where God has you and that you are doing what He wants you to do by going to PA school, then you can rest in that. I think if you pray, that is the best thing. Because you can have confidence that you are doing the best thing you cna do for those people. You are petitioning the God of the universe for their help. If that isn't good enough, then you probably need to reconsider whether or not you need to be in the States. If you are certain that you should be here, then you will be able to be content with praying for them, because that is all you can do at this time. That's how I have learned to be content with being in the states. I still want to run out and help the nations when I see someone hurting, but I know that I can do much greater by being here, where God has called me for now, and making people aware of what's going on in the world. I don't know...take it for what you will, but you shouldn't feel guilty, and you are not guilty if you are doing all that you can to help.
Steph
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