Due to an unexpected and very unusual twist in end of rotation plans last week, it turns out I am doing the very last rotation, the last 28 days, the LAST TINY LITTLE PIECE OF SCHOOL OF MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE with...
Kids with cancer. And blood diseases. (Also known to us as, hematology and onocology or- as everyone prefers to skip most of that- heme/onc.)
It is kind of sad.
I don't like any of the stories these patients have. All of their stories, so far, are very sad. These children are the living examples of the weakness of humanity. They are so innocent and sick.
My two patients are:
Sweet little M, 2 years old, with a big hard tumor in her belly and metastases to both her lungs. She hasn't been in the hospital long enough to know that not everything we do hurts so she has a raging case of White Coat syndrome. Take the white coat off and she is one sweet little pea. Approach her in the white coat and you will wish for a fate worse than death!
Today we heavily sedated her and punched holes in her hip bones to get some bone marrow. Ouch. Luckily, there was no cancer there so most likely she'll never have to have that done again- unlike kiddos with leukemia, who get it done weekly.
And little Mr. R... is an 11 month old baby who has a recently resected very rare brain tumor. Actually, they haven't even been able to diagnose it exactly yet. So, he's going home tomorrow while things get figured out. He has an 8cm scar across the top of his skull and a lop-sided little smile that would outcharm Elvis Presley. This little man may have to have chemo that would irreversibly scar his kidneys and he may not and end up leading a perfectly normal life.
Its this dichotomy of good and awful that seems to follow us around our whole lives... we can hardly enjoy the one without the other popping up and looming over our heads, threatening to destroy everything.
Or maybe that's a lie, and there are some things that cannot be destroyed... even by death. Give us peace in our hearts Lord. Let it be a long, long road with a good, good end.
2 comments:
your heart is so loving erin - these little peas are blessed! I know that there is a reason you are on this rotation, if not only as a very well practiced/ trained PA Student.
erin, we will absolutly be here and available in January. At least Hannah and me...that is in the middle of busy season for Jon so who knows if he will be available much, but that's okay. What brings you to CO? AND, we got your invitation the other day and according to that, you've only got 24-25 days till graduation?!? Are you ecstatic?!?
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